A-Z-T-E-C Got Next!

Lovin' this Aztec Motto! Get it TES! I'm an Aztec for life!

Reader Submission: Mother of the Year

I have no words. I am anti-pageant myself, but I don't judge those that do. But this lady here and her child... I have no words at all! But if you do feel free to leave them in the comments!

Thanks Ecart for sharing!

Are You on the Kobe System?

After tonight's game I bet a lot of folks are trying! Did you catch it?

via Jocks and Stiletto Jill

The Three Year Rule

After 10 years, LeBron put a ring on it...

On Thanksgiving Day, my beloved and I were driving up to my parent's house. We were discussing past relationships and I mumbled something about my 3 year rule. Boo was baffled. What is a 3 year rule?

I believe that relationships should not  go past three years without an engagement, talk of marriage, or some sort of talk about long term plans for a relationship. I believe if you have been in a relationship for 3 years and you do not know if you want to marry that person, then you are wasting your time. Now, I don't believe you have to be married within 3 years, but you should know where the relationship is going and both parties should be clear about this.

LaLa & Carmelo Anthony were engaged for 6 years before they made it to the altar.

Now Boo thought I was just giving out some arbitrary timeline and trying to give him a nudge, which I'm not. We ended up having this debate for a few days and included my parents in the talk. I think he understands where I'm coming from. But he was like, if I don't ask you to marry me in 3 years you are just going to leave me?

I'm not X-ing out the days on my calendar until 2014, but I'm no fool either. I just explained to him that in year 1 we are learning each other and getting comfortable. In year 2, usually something happens to make you realize this person is or isn't the one for you. You may have to deal with a health scare, a death in the family, financial trouble, or some kind of setback that will show you that your significant other is going to step up to the challenge or dip out on you. The third year should be you two planning how you are going to spend the rest of your lives together, or saying "I can't really see it with you" and chunkin up the deuces.

After 7 years Jim Jones put a ring on it... But Chrissy asked him first...

This blog was saved as a draft for a month or so now. I dusted it off after news of LeBron James proposing to longtime girlfriend Savannah Brinson hit the net. And then I saw the episode of Love & Hip Hop where Jim Jones proposed to girlfriend Chrissy Lampkin, after she proposed to him. It got me thinking about the the 3 year rule again. Now, I'm merely speculating based on what I've read on the gossip blogs or seen on reality TV, but if these girls are so pressed to marry these men, why are they waiting so damn long for the men to come around?

Me personally, I couldn't just sit around waiting for 7 or 10 years, having his babies, and doing wifely things without making it official. I'm old school in that I still see value and prestige in getting married. But I have learned from my own failed marriage that you have to marry the right person. Now I have a friend that has been with her man for over a decade, beautiful home, beautiful family and they are HAPPY, but they decided to not get married. He did propose and gave her a beautiful engagement ring and it works for them. But my friend is not calling me crying, asking why won't he do the right thing.

Emily is still waiting for Fabolous to put a ring on it; I'm just waiting for him to look happy to be with her.

I think my point is if you want to get married, that is a discussion that has to be held with your partner. I think it's something to be disclosed upfront, as in "one day I'd like to be a wife and/or mother, once I meet and settle down with the right man (and don't panic, I'm not saying that's you)"; and then again after a relationship has been established, as in "we are in love and have a great relationship, and I can see us going long term. What are your thoughts?'. If he says he doesn't want to get married (like marriage is not in the cards for him with you or anyone), or he's uncertain about a future with you, then you have to decide to fold, check or go all in. He may come around eventually, but are you gambling with the best years of your life for someone who doesn't think you are a sure bet?

What are your thoughts? How long have you waited? Are you still waiting? Speak on it in the comments section!

Hello 2012!!!

I'm not in Paris, but I wish I was! Maybe next year...

Happy 2012 dear readers! I hope you brought the new year in right, got home safely, and are spending the day with the people you love. I didn't have a raging New Years Eve like I did last year, but it was a wonderful evening nonetheless. I woke up this morning thinking about how different my life is now from a year ago. Here are some of the things I learned in 2011:

1) Sometimes you just have to step out on faith. I spent the beginning of the year planning and agonizing over moving back to my hometown. I don't do well with change, and the idea of all that upheaval along with all the stress that comes with moving... I was scared! Plus I was focused so much on what I didn't have and whether I would be able to do this on my own. My mother really pushed me, and while I found it really annoying at times, I realize now that I needed it. At some point you have to stop worrying about what could go wrong and just have faith that it will turn out right.

2) Focus on the things you can control. I spent a lot of time speculating about what could happen, driving myself crazy trying to prepare a defense for an unworthy opponent. I realize I can't control everything around me, but I can control how I handle myself. I am a very sensitive, emotional person and I realize that sometimes people will try to exploit that. I have to be careful and not feed into the negative energy.

3) Being single is a lot of fun. Of course I can say this in hindsight. But if you read my Living Single blog series, you have to admit my adventures in dating were quite funny. I still laugh when I think about the preacher man! But what I learned was if I kept a good attitude and remained open to different possibilities anything could happen. When I kept my objective on having fun I could really enjoy the process of dating.

4) Love sneaks up on you. Being in a relationship was not even on my radar at the beginning of 2011. I hadn't been dating and I had no idea what kind of men were out there. And I was kind of in that who is gonna want me head space. But a fluke conversation has blossomed into quite a romance. Who knew?

5) Your thoughts are powerful. This year I realized how much my thoughts betray me. My whole internal dialogue was on some self-defeat ish. I don't know if I've always been that way or if it's a byproduct of what I had been through. But I started listening to what I was telling myself about myself and man was it eye-opening! It is an ongoing process, but it's working. For instance, that aforementioned who is gonna want me turned into who wouldn't want me? See what I'm talking about!

So, with that in mind, here are my resolutions for 2012:

1) Living in abundance. I tend to focus on not having enough, and I realize that I have more than a lot of folks. Instead of worrying about what I don't have, I need to be grateful for what I do have. I realize that I'm focusing energy on the wrong things.

2) Do Work Son! My home life is settled, my kid is doing great, my love life is great and my family is healthy. It's time to focus on my career goals and further my education. I realize I have grown complacent and part of that is because I'm really comfortable where I am at. It's time to really look at where I'm at and where I'm trying to go, make a plan and do the work. Let's get it!

3) Lose these last pounds. So cliche but so true. My boyfriend and I have a weight loss challenge. I have to lose 22 pounds (he has to lose 15) by March 18th or suffer some insane consequence yet to be decided. So I'll be blogging about my efforts and you can also track my progress on the right side of the page. I'll be using My Fitness Pal to track my calorie consumption and exercise. I know men lose weight faster than women, but something tells me I'm gonna smoke him on this one!

So what did you learn in 2011, and what are your New Years Resolutions? And don't hit me with the whole "resolutions are stupid" bit, because that's just not fun! Leave me a comment! And may you have a blessed and prosperous 2012!

Things I Have to Get Used to Now That Basketball is Back...

Basketball season is finally (FINALLY!!!) upon us, and as a diehard Laker fan, I am somewhat confused. I'm watching the pre-season game versus the Clippers and I feel like I'm in an alternate universe. Here are a few of the things I have to get acclimated with during the shortened 2011-2012 season:

1) No Phil Jackson: I miss the man already. I'm going to try to be optimistic about Mike Brown, but... uhhhh.... I miss Phil. Please come back!

2) No Kobe & Vanessa Sideline/Tunnel Make Out Sessions: We get it already! And in spite of all that sugar he still went astray!

3) No Announcers Saying "ARTEST!": I just now figured out who Metta World Peace is. SMH

4) No Lamar Odom: Also no Khloe Kardashian Odom courtside. I like him as a Laker, I like them as a couple. This trade makes me sad.

5) I'll actually be watching the Clippers games. That sentence just made me shiver. Do me a favor and keep this little tidbit between us.

6) I don't know anything about any of these new guys. And I miss my crush Shannon Brown. *Pouts*

7) Andrew Bynum actually playing. I thought this guy lived on the injured list!

Nonetheless, I'm excited the season is finally here. The guys look a little rusty, and that's to be expected with all of the upheaval going on with the lockout, shady trade vetos (yes I'm still salty) and all the personnel changes. It's going to take a minute for the guys to gel and find their rhythm. I'm happy Pau Gasol is not letting the trade frenzy get to him, that's the way to be a player in this league.

What are you looking forward to, and what has you confuzzled? Leave a comment!

Savvy Sisters: Necole Bitchie

It's no secret, I am a Necole Bitchie fan. I love her site and her business model. And this is a great interview featuring her. I have always admired her willingness to share her story with her readers. I think she should write a book similar to Angel Law's of Concrete Loop (a must read if you are a blogger). Enjoy!